Constantly reminded of the Grace I have received...

2013!  I can't believe it.  Like many others, I was sure we'd be driving around flying cars and living on Mars by now...luckily, I just get to drive around my land boat and live in my  little country house just outside of the greatest place on Earth (Athens, GA - not Disney world :)).

We had a crazy, stressful, fun, wonderful Christmas.  Christmas with young children is not for the faint of heart.  We travel and come home Christmas Eve night...and then went to my parents on Christmas Day.  Traveling with young'uns is always stressful - other people's houses/rules/stuff, etc.  That is a post that could go on for days...needless to say, I am NEVER relaxed with my children at anyone else's home...which can make me come across...errr...bitchy (there, I just said it...I couldn't think of a nicer way to say it).  I HATE that...but, it makes me all snappy and on the defensive and annoyed with my toddler who is LOVING to push every limit she can find.  God help us if this is a sneak peek of her teenage years.  I digress...Christmas was wonderful...Santa was so good to us...as were the grandparents, aunts and uncles, cousins, friends.  (Half of it still remains in the box as we are mean like that and are going to dole it out over time).

  

New Year's was fun...our tradition continues as BT leaves us (damn UGA for playing on New Year's day!) and Mandie and the girls came to spend the night.  I love those crazy, loud, total chaos nights.  For the first time ever, I think, I spent some alone, quality time with Brooke.  She sleeps in our closet here in a pack-n-play...and she woke up about 11:30.  Yeah, that's how we roll...Mandie and Emma went to bed at 9:30.  At least I made it until 11:30!  So, Miss Brooke woke up and was cold and then needed some chocolate milk and then needed to watch George.  So, she layed in bed with me watching George and drinking her "bobbie"...until 1:00AM!  I fell asleep after kissing her cheek for New Year's (Rob was hanging in the den watching TV still) and woke up to her still just watching the tube at 1.  I drew the nice Tata line there and put that sweetie back to bed.

  The babies both had tubes put in their ears on December 28th.  It was stressful, but they were TOTALLY FINE afterwards (well, Madeline basically screamed until we got in the car...but, she was fine).  Mom and Dad took Molly for a couple of nights so the twins could have man-to-man coverage.  Although, technically, they didn't require any more attention or work than normal, we were just CRAZY tired.  We had to be at the hospital at 5:30AM (yes, we were 15 minutes late, but no one was waiting on us), so, Thursday night we just caught a quick catnap before heading to the hospital.  We all crashed at our normal 10AM nap time.  They look pretty pitiful in the pictures, but, they were VERY WELL TAKEN CARE OF and not once acted like they were in any kind of pain.

I've been super stressed lately and very short tempered.  I've been quick to pitch a little hissy fit and quick to get super annoyed with typical toddler-isms.  I've been pretty difficult.  God is constantly reminding me of the grace I've received...and, I haven't technically ignored it, but, I haven't let it really sink in.  Tonight, I was once again reminded of His grace.  I pray that I can move forward each day with more grace than the last.  I have wonderfully healthy children, a loving husband, a beautiful home in a safe country where I am free.  God please continue to remind me of these blessings and help me be more graceful in my days.

Happy New year!  May God Bless us all in 2013.

Where's Marlin now?!

The boy loves to see what he can climb into!!!

And, just like that...The babies are ONE!

OUR BABIES ARE ONE!!!

Seriously, fastest year EVER.  Our sweet babies are an entire year old.  I can't even take it.

At their 1 year (not so) well check, Marlin weighed in at 21 lbs, 6 ounces and Madeline weighed in at 19 lbs 5 ounces.  Additional stats:

diaper size – 3 – 4s or 5s at night

clothes - size 12 months for Madeline, 12 – 18 for Marlin

shoes - size 3 for Madeline, 4 – 5 for Marlin

teeth – 4 on top and 2 on bottom for Mad, 2 on bottom for Marlin

sleeping – eh…we stay in the bed for about 12 hours at night…but, we certainly are still waking up – Marlin usually only once and Madeline usually twice (and the Pixie thinks she should get up at dawn and then sleep with Momma until a more reasonable wake time)…they both still nurse during one of those times because I just can’t stand to let them cry.

nursing – these kids will nurse until they go to college if we let them (especially Madeline!)…However, they are totally DIGGING almond milk right now.  Perhaps they are weaning themselves from nursing, and, that makes me a little sad.  I've been pregnant or nursing since June of 2009.  What am I going to do if this body is all mine?

eating - OH YES!  Everything.  However, we still eat a lot of baby food.  At this time with Moo, we were not eating baby food, but, they are getting to where they will eat whatever we offer them.   Baby food is just so easy...

crawling – oh yes – and pushing toys, and couch surfing, and maybe taking a step here and there (Madeline for sure has taken about 4 single steps in the past week, Marlin has taken a few consecutive steps, but, my boy is timid...)  Madeline likes to stand and do squats J

climbing - everything -  we have re-entered baby gate heaven

We had the babies first birthday party on December 1st.  It was a great time...and, I'm so thankful for my sister and mother in law for helping pull it off.  The sandwiches wouldn't have been finished and the food wouldn't have made it to the table without them!

We had a snowman/snowflake themed party...but, thankfully, the weather outside was NOT frightful!  We were blessed with a GORGEOUS day and lots of friends to celebrate these sweet angels.   Below are pictures from their special day and from a "smash cake" session with our favorite photographer Katie Daniels.  What you can't tell from the pictures too well is that Marlin wasn't a huge fan of the cake and Madeline wanted more :).  My meat and potatoes boy and sugary sweet girl.

Good-bye, Bertha Jean.

This past Thursday there was a meteor shower.  I can't say I ever really participate in those types of events.  I do admire the moon regularly, but, the last time I saw a shooting star would have been middle school.  Thursday night I saw seven.  SEVEN.  And, that was only in about a 30 minute time frame.  They were gorgeous.  Also on Thursday night, my grandmother's sister, my great Aunt Jean met the Lord.  I'd like to think those 7 shooting stars were Heaven's way of greeting Jean and letting me know that she was safe and in her Father's arms.  A Heavenly celebration, if you will.

She was 83.  She had a long life and was able to raise her children and even know her grandchildren as adults.  I'd be happy to live that long.  I wish I'd had my Granny until she was 83.  She died when I was 14...this coming May she will have been gone 20 years.  TWENTY YEARS.  If only my Granny had been here the last 20 years.  She'd have met her 2 grandsons and SEVEN great-grandchildren.  She'd have been at her son's wedding and her 3 grand daughters weddings.  She'd have met and loved her three grand-son in laws.  She'd have held her daughter's hand through breast cancer...twice...and celebrated her survival.  She could have taught me how to make her sweet tea (I really think she used 3 cups of suger in ONE pitcher...).  Her life was cut short.  Jean had an awesome run...and, she was healthy for most of it, which is important.  Who wants to live till you're 200 if you spent 150 of it sick in a hospital?

In the end, it's never enough.  We all want more.  One more year, to perhaps meet a great grandchild, one more Christmas, one more birthday with your family and friends.  Her funeral is tomorrow.  I'm not going, and I really don't have a great excuse.  I've missed a lot of work lately with sick children, the holidays are coming up and I have lots to accomplish before then.  Nursing twins makes it difficult to be away for many hours.  The list of excuses is long and not half way decent.  You know why I'm really not going?  Because I just can't face it.  The finality of her passing is so heart breaking to me.  That ENTIRE GENERATION from my Mom's side of our family is gone.  An entire generation.  There's no one left to ask questions like, "What was it like being a child during the Depression?  What do you remember about WWII?"  There is no one left to answer questions about names of past generations.  Mom said today that she never knew her Great-Grandmother's name - she just knew her as "Nanny" - there is no one left to tell her.  It terrifies me that my parents are now the oldest generation.  TERRIFIES.

On Friday, one of the most horrific tragedies that has happened during my lifetime occurred at an elementary school in Connecticut.  20 children and 7 adults lost their lives.  20 children younger than 10 years old.  I haven't watched too much of the news, because I just cannot go there.

I needed a healthy dose of perspective lately... minuscule things have been driving me crazy....like silverware loaded in the dishwasher prongs up (only spatulas should face up)...pants being folded with a pleat in the pant leg (if they don't have a pleat in the legs, don't force one!)...the sippy cups being put away without fist having been put together (but, I never put the bottles together before putting them away - I know, it doesn't make sense)...hardly ever making it to school before carpool ends (seriously, don't shut down carpool at 8:59:59...school starts at 9!)...2 year olds that think they know more than you  (only time will cure this one :)).  Yes, I admit, I needed a healthy dosing of "get-over-youself-your life is wonderful - now shut the hell up".  I got it.  Load the dishwasher however you like, fold pants whichever way suits you, I'll walk my kid into school in my jammies with my head held high.  I got the message.  My perspective cup runneth over.  Please, Lord, I don't need anymore perspective checks...possibly EVER.

My prayer tonight...
Lord, please bless us with a healthy family, please bless us with many, many, many more years with our parents, please bless our children with happiness always.  Please do not let them ever witness the horror of an event such as that in Connecticut on Friday.  Please bless them with a long relationship with their grandparents.  Please bless those families in Connecticut who are experiencing a pain I pray to never know.  Please bless Aunt Sarah as she buries her Momma and hold her lovingly in Your comfort.

Rest in peace, Aunt Jean.  You are loved and will be missed.  We will see you again one day.

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